saw the temp last night and was quite shocked that i couldn't say a thing. felt a bit scared. maybe that's the real thing that would be shown if it finally really hit. i've predicted that there must be something behind the things just shown in the surface. too calm and maybe looks ignorant sometimes. bit similar to my old man. ann did told us about testing the water to see if there's any violence might involved. i'm definitely sure it's not for this one. but still, the temp itself shocked me.

i guess i screwed things up again. big time this time. don't know if there's any remedy for it or it's just it.

sigh.