if only

if only all the bad people are as stupid as he is
if only all of them are as "honest" as he is
if only they are as "generous" as he is
if only...

too bad that he is really that slow and the damages are so disadvantaging. hmph..

trying too hard or not hard enough?

that i myself can't answer. different people would see it differently on how much effort you put into something.

waiting for reality to kick in

hate this uncertainty. haven't feel anything big yet but surely it will if it finally gonna really hit this time. or maybe i'm just in denial for the hundreds of times.

little update dari apel gede

tokyo is cancelled, so we extended 2 more days in NY. oh, ndin still stick to the plan so she's leaving tomorrow morning. err.. make that in a few hours.

have to plan perfectly for the appointment in narita with the guy who'll deliver the items we firstly planned to meet in tokyo.. hope it'll work.

i just lost my holiday mood because of that stupid useless one. i'm so, so angry that i feel like swearing, punching and kicking him all at once. can't he do something right for once?? i mean, for god's sake, it's his fucking business too!!! can't he use his brain on this??

aarrgghhh, i'm so pissed off right now!!!

those bastards also crossed the line, but too bad it was that useless one they're always looking for and clearly everyone can see why. i don't care if we won't have any relationship with them in the future, they're no good but all disadvantaging for us anyway.

and for the stupid one, he might do nothing good either except just for the sake that he's exist.

BAH!!!

there are some things i did and said just out of feeling that it's a must. something like "sopan-santun". or maybe "basa-basi" would describe it more perfect.

anyway, in LA now, staying in san's house and have no idea where to go.