is it a crime or a bad thing if i want him to want the same thing i want? or is it as a new friend said that men don't care about small stuffs? so they are just simply ignorant about those things. if yes, then poor those women who expect their men to be more caring and sensitive. as for my case, seems the more i want it the harder i get it. that young fortune teller did once told me about this. instead of chasing it hardly i should just let things loose a bit and it shall come to me. easier said than done. moreover, time plays a role too here.

silly pet

facebook bener2 sesuatu yg membuang banyak waktu tapi bener2 bikin addicted sampe kerjaan bisa lupa dikerjain gara2 ini. bahaya banget.

so not in the mood for anything. monthly cramps to top it off.

i'm still scared about that thing that it haunted me in my dreams. it's the second time this week. i need to find that secure feeling back. i don't know how but definitely i can't do it by myself.

an unspoken note to you

when i said i can't forget what you did and don't know how to fully trust you again, i really meant it. and i expected you that time to be humble, to lower your ego and calm me down. but instead, you act ignorant and arrogantly said, "jadi gimana donk?". dengan tampang dan nada menantang.

you really don't know how to have a relationship, do you? you really don't know where your position is. after what you did, itu benar2 tidak pada tempatnya. tidak sadar dimana seharusnya menempatkan posisi diri sendiri. dan itu sangat mengecewakan. atau semua itu dilakukan dengan sengaja dengan maksud memancing reaksi selanjutnya dari pihak sini? supaya dapat escape dengan mudahnya? karena situ sebagai pihak bersalah tidak punya nyali untuk melakukannya?

do you really think that no matter what you do i would always stick around? cos you know the reason for me being attached and you make use of that? so you can do whatever you like and think that it's my choice to accept it? if yes, ashamed to admit it myself, you're no gentleman at all. you're just a boy with a giant ego. i hope you do realize that pathetic truth about yourself.

all about dreams

been curious, so i google it and found http://www.dreammoods.com/ and here are the results:

Rainbow
To see a rainbow in your dream, signifies much hope, success and good fortune in the form of money, prestige, or fame. The rainbow is a bridge between your earthly, grounded self and the higher, spiritual self.
--> crossing my fingers

Park
To dream that you are at a park, represents a temporary escape from reality. It indicates renewal, meditation, and spirituality. It is also an indication of a readjustment period after a serious personal conflict or an ending of a passionate affair.

Water
To see water in your dream, symbolizes your unconscious and your emotional state of mind. Water is the living essence of the psyche and the flow of life energy. It is also symbolic of spirituality, knowledge, healing and refreshment.
If you are splashed by water, then it represents your need to be revitalized and more expressive.

Walls
To see a wall in your dream, signifies limitations. obstacles and boundaries. There is a barrier obstructing your progress. You may have been accustomed to your old habits and way of thinking.
If you see a wall crumble, then it suggests that you have easily risen above your problems and overcame your barriers.
--> does cracks and crumble means the same?

Woman
To see a woman in your dream, represents nurturance, passivity, caring nature, and love. It refers to your own female aspects or may also represent your mother. Alternatively, it may indicate temptation and guilt. If you know the woman, then it may symbolize the concerns and feelings you have about her.
To see an old woman in your dream, indicates aging and growing old.
--> OMG!! as if i'm not aware of that ='(

so?

hm.. bener2 lagi gak ada kerjaan ya gue sampe sempet2nya nyari arti mimpi di google hehe..